Not long ago, Five Nerds made a semi-tasteless (alright, completely tasteless) joke about the longstanding hypothesis that cell-phones give you cancer.

We said that it wouldn’t be long before people were shouting about the risks of radiating our noggins, and it appears we were right.

Submitted for your reading pleasure, an article about a recent study which suggests that people who use their phones actively have “significantly higher” brain activity in the area closest to the telephone antenna.  The National Institutes of Health study measured glucose metabolism of the brain as an indicator, and it is still too early to predict whether the effects are long-lasting or dangerous. 

The article further suggests that wireless earpieces might be a lower wattage alternative to holding your antenna so close to your dome.

With that said, if you have the choice of radiating your brain, or not radiating your brain, it really doesn’t seem like a choice, does it?

Sometimes an events occur which makes you see things in a different light.  For instance, if you have ever purchased a car, you are probably familiar with the realization that as soon as you start driving it, you pretty much start seeing them everywhere.  You knew that other people own the exact same model, but you never realized that you see dozens of them each day on your way to work, and just never noticed them before.

About a week ago, a fellow nerd was ranting about news and pseudo-news articles which contain a number.  As soon as he suggested it, I started seeing them everywhere:

• Top 10 Most Useful Screen Capture Software For Windows
• 4 Reasons to Sell a Stock
• Top 5 Hackers in the World
• The 6 Best Tools To Schedule Twitter Updates
• X Reasons To Get A Droid X

I’m not making those up.  Numbered lists are everywhere.

Wayne’s World Top Ten Halloween Costumes

Today, CNN Senior Medical Correspondent, Elizabeth Cohen published an article titled: Five ways your cell phone can save you.  Wow.  Five different ways?  Calling for help seems like the most likely, but you have my interest piqued, Elizabeth.  Please, do tell.

1)  Program your cell so people can find you
     Are you kidding?  I’m already pretty convinced that I’m being tracked, and you want me to LoJack myself and make my location public knowledge? 

2)  Put your “in case of emergency” contact into your cell phone
     Honestly, Elizabeth, if I’m found face down in a bowl of soup in a restaurant, I’d prefer you call 911, not my wife.  While she is skilled in CPR, the response time would probably be a lot quicker from the fire department—especially since they won’t think twice about whether they want to revive me or not.  Remember these are tips that are supposed to save me.  Calling my next of kin seems a little after the fact if I need saving.

3)  Put your medical information on your cell
     OK.  I’ll grant you some leeway this one.  It seems like sound advice, however, unless there is a standard place to store the information on a phone, odds are emergency professionals aren’t likely to find your drug allergies before triage begins.  If you have some information you want rescuers to know, I still advise you wear a Medic Alert Bracelet instead.  Another advantage of the bracelet is that it probably didn’t shatter on impact against my dashboard, or slide under my seat in the head-on auto collision I just suffered.

4)  Get an app that teaches you first aid and CPR
     Alright, now you are just trying to stretch this list to five items aren’t you?  Seriously, what kind of self-respecting medical correspondent would advise that people learn CPR from their iPhone?

5)  Find help nearby
     Okay, finding a nearby clinic or emergency room seems like a pretty good use of your phone, but I still maintain that calling 911 is a better use.

So with that, here is my advice to writers and bloggers:  If you have something to say, just say it.  It doesn’t have to be numbered, and it doesn’t have to comprise a list.  If there is something in my house that can kill me, let me know.  Don’t feel that you need to find three other things that might be somewhat harmful before you publish your article with a clever alliteration like “Four Foods to Fend off, to Fight Fatality.“ 

Numbered lists shouldn’t be banned altogether, just use them sparingly please.

So before we get into it, this isn’t going to be an Apple-bashing session.  When I use the phrase iPod, I mean any portable listening device.  I suppose iPod has become the household term, much the same as Kleenex means tissue to most people. 

Let’s expand further to any device which we use on a frequent basis that forces our mind to work, even when we think we are relaxing—i.e. television, phone, automobile.

The New York Times reported today that scientists at University of California, San Francisco have issued the findings of a new study on rats, and the way they process new information.  Rats that give their minds a rest have better recollection of their new-found information.  The scientists suspect that this may be the same amongst humans, and certainly nerds are a subgenus of humans, so this should concern you too.

University of Michigan studies have shown that people who walk in a serene natural environment learn significantly better afterward, than a control group which walked in an urban setting.  The correlation being suggested is that processing information fatigues the mind, even if it is something we enjoy, or perceive as relaxing.

As we struggle to stay connected in an ever-evolving technological landscape, should we worry that we aren’t getting enough real downtime, and giving our brains time to process new information?

Perhaps that is why I’m a big fan of naps. 

The next time you think you are relaxing in front of the television, think about how hard your brain is working to keep up.  Even more if you are multitasking (I have the television on in the background as I write this). 

You owe it to yourself to relax more, and take in what you are learning.  Are you giving yourself enough rest?